Social skills before kindergarten

Preschool Ready Activities

Many social skills can be learned before entering kindergarten. Preschool ready activities can help form the foundations for becoming a successful adult. 

Along with the educational opportunities, schools provide an early exposure to the rules of society. Developing social skills can enable children to navigate through early relationships and conflicts successfully. Taking advantage of daily opportunities may not only prepare children for kindergarten but for life. 

While preschools and child care centers can encourage the development of early social skills, the techniques and suggestions listed can still be very beneficial. In addition, practicing at home and in the community can reinforce the lessons learned and show support to the teachers in an early learning environment. 

Sharing Preschool Activities 

The skills needed for sharing can be difficult to master, even for adults. In a society that often promotes gaining more assets, giving can be hard to comprehend. If practiced at an early age the activities that promote sharing can lead to a future of positive behaviors. 

Sharing training ideas that parents can complete at home: 

Play days – Incorporate other children into the child’s play area. Sharing is one of many skills that can be practiced in this fun environment. 

Fun Snacks – Practice sharing food with the child. Use one portion of a fun dessert to share between parent and child. Encouraging positive experiences can make sharing fun. 

Holiday gifts – Use the holidays as a teaching opportunity. Let the child select two toys of a similar price. After the purchase, the child can pick the toy he/she wants to keep. The second toy will then be donated to a child in need. 

Taking Turns Preschool Activities 

Very similar to sharing is the ability to take turns. Taking turns can be difficult since this skill incorporates sharing with waiting. The combination can take time developmentally but early efforts are not without reward. 

Kids can practice taking turn ideas in a variety of environments: 

Reinforce the world – Explain natural taking turns opportunities as they occur. From a basketball game to giving the right of way while driving, adults have to take turns every day. 

Story time – Create a story as a group. Each person can make up a few sentences of a story. Each person starts from where the last person stopped in the story. This not only is a fun way to practice waiting but listening skills while promoting creativity. 

Radio search – After listening to two or three songs let someone else pick the station. This is a fun way to add a little variety to a long trip. 

Nap Time Preschool Activities 

Nap time involves more than just sleeping. Except for the earliest years of elementary school, nap time is not scheduled but the skills learned from this period continue to be helpful later in life. Children are not forced to sleep but they are encouraged to remain in one area quietly during the nap period. 

Simple nap time training at home: 

Sleeping Routine – Practice nap times in a common environment and consistent time to build a routine. Midday, following lunch, is the typical nap time for young children in most child care facilities. At home, use a mat or cot to provide a comfortable sleep area similar to the school environment. 

Alone Time Development – Incorporate times for the child to entertain himself. This alone time can help develop the child’s imagination. This time is also important so the child is familiar with having independence during an activity. 

Quiet Activity Practice – Introduce and explore quiet activities at an early age. Reading books, completing puzzles, or exploring toys are all options. Children that can sit quietly will transition through the nap time period easier. 

Through practice of these simple activities it is possible for children to gain many early social skills prior to kindergarten. These skills will create a strong foundation for early learners and plant the seed for learning.

The Benefit of Teaching Young Children Responsibility

Facilitating responsibility in young children encourages independent behavior, a positive self-esteem and provides practical benefits for the classroom. 

Encouraging responsibility during the early childhood years has many lifelong benefits. Not only does it aid in teaching time management and making daily family routines easier; teaching responsibility encourages independent thinking and problem solving skills. Activities aimed at encouraging responsibility are the building blocks for developing a sense of order, concentration, coordination and independence. 

Three Years Onward 

By the time a child is three years old, independent behavior can be easily fostered into responsibility. This is an age when young children enjoy doing meaningful tasks. Children by the age of three should be able to wake up with the aid of an alarm clock and dress themselves with only shoes to be tied, or help with buttoning and zipping. 

Preparing the Environment 

Preparing the environment is imperative for the child's success. Parents can facilitate independent behavior by refusing to discuss or argue about accomplishing these daily routines in the morning. Preparing and planning the night before will help eliminate the possibility of a tantrum. Providing foot stools to encourage independent hand washing and preparing the bedroom to assist with organization will ensure success. The prepared environment should never be without adult supervision. 

The Philosophy Behind Teaching Independence and Responsibility 

Teaching independence and responsibility during the early childhood years goes beyond the action of completing the task. It is the skills and thought processes needed that build up to completing the task. One good example is the 1980's hit movie, "The Karate Kid," with Mr. Miyagi who agrees to teach young Daniel karate. One popular scene was the wax on wax off; when Daniel thought he was just waxing an old car. In theory, Mr. Miyagi was teaching Daniel technique and skill which he would later implement in the tournament. 

The example is the method of teaching: mastery goals and performance goals. Mastery goals teach the process of effort, improvement and genuine learning. Performance goals teach comparison, competition and recognition. When teaching a young child responsibility and independence, the goal to keep in mind is mastery. The mastery teaches: critical thinking skills, concentration, coordination, independence, eye-hand coordination, gross motor and fine motor skills. These skills are indirectly being taught to assist with reading, writing and math. Helping to rake leaves outside or setting the table will assist with problem solving and critical thinking skills. What materials and tools are needed? What is done first, second and third? Preparation of a fruit salad will teach the child eye-hand coordination, fine motor skills, math skills and problem solving skills. 

Ideas to Encourage the Independent Child 

folding and putting away pajamas 

helping to sort laundry 

matching socks 

putting dirty clothes in the hamper 

selecting clothes each day the night before 

hanging up towels with assistance of a foot stool in the bathroom 

caring for toileting needs 

bathe themselves (with assistance as needed) 

brushing teeth with supervision 

washing hands 

helping to set and clear the table 

sitting and maintaining at the table during meal time 

preparing instant pudding 

peeling carrots or cucumbers 

watering plants with a spray bottle

feeding pets 

caring for pets 

helping to rake leaves 

planting in the garden 

dusting 

cleaning up after spills 

spread cheese or peanut butter on bread or celery sticks 

slicing soft fruits such as bananas or avocados 

helping to wash the car 

helping to wash toys 

helping to wash a bicycle 

clean table with a sponge 

putting toys away 

returning and placing books on a bookshelf 

blowing and wiping own nose and disposing of tissue appropriately 

bringing in the mail 

fill salt and pepper shakers with a funnel 

turning water off completely at the sink when finished 

turning off the lights when leaving a room 

Conclusion

Adult supervision is important when teaching independence and responsibility. It is important to remember not to expect perfection or implement performance goal strategies by comparing the child to another child, or setting up the child to complete the task for recognition. Instead, complement and encourage the child for a great job well done

JEMPUTAN

Assalamualaikum Warahmatullahi Wabarakatuh

MAJLIS BACAAN YASSIN & DOA SELAMAT

Dengan sepenuh hormat menjemput

Tuan puan serta seisi keluarga

ke Majlis Bacaan Yassin dan Doa Selamat

Tarikh : Ahad (01/01/2012)

Masa : 11.00 - Bacaan Yassin & Doa Selamat


: 12.00 - Makan Tengahari

Tempat : Tadika Graduan Bestari

Simple way to help your child love school

With the beauty of a new academic year upon us: Make it a fresh start. Here are some ways you
can help build on that positive spirit all year long.

Read aloud

It's not just for little kids. Picture books are great for all ages and kids never outgrow the pleasure of being read to. Create a special reading corner at home. Children who enjoy reading tend to perform better in school than those who don't.

Set up a desk

This shows how seriously you take their schoolwork. Anything you make space for in your home is obviously valued, so if school is your child's job, their desk is their office.

Let them work it out
Homework isn't only about learning facts; It's also about learning independently. Some kids need rewards to get them through the work. Others might need a supportive presence. Either way, the more kids achieve on their own, the more confidently they can tackle the next challenges.

Recruit a mentor

Your child loves you, but you're, you know , a grown-up. Set your kid up with a peer mentor, someone just a year or two older who can relate to their day-to-day experiences and offer encouragement. Many schools are embracing the idea. See if your child's school has a program in place or help launch one.

Support your social butterfly

A wide circle of friends gives kids options on the playground. Try to encourage your kids to invite someone new over to play. After-school activities can also help broaden their social horizons.

Model a love of learning

Kids are naturally curious, so set good examples. Pick up a book, play Scrabble, talk about current events. This will help foster their curiosity.

Buddy up with the teacher

Teachers can give a more objective picture of your child's day and help you uncover trouble spots. The teacher may also be able to shed some light on things your child has trouble expressing.

Offer support

Be there for them! Attend school events, don't miss parent/teacher conferences and try to have lunch with them at least once a month. And most important, always remember to encourage them to succeed and even excel!

The clash of the parents

As you and your spouse share the responsibilities of parenting and managing the family's day-to-day activities, problems will arise. Here are a few of the most common difficulties that today's parents encounter and how you can handle them:

Inconsistency.

Often parents differ in their rules and expectations for their child. Mom might say, "you can't watch TV until your homework is finished," but when she's away, dad may say, "Go ahead and watch TV if you want to." Dad might insist that the child's bedtime is 8:30; Mom may say that stretching it until 9:00 is fine.

Similar conflicts can develop over issues like approaches to discipline or a child's choice of friends. When these inconsistencies occur, one parent inevitably undermines the authority of the other. To begin to resolve this problem, you and your spouse need to be explicit with each other about what your rules and expectations are. If necessary, write them down, review them and be sure they are workable. In areas in which you differ, find a compromise that you both can live with - and stick by it.

Non-communication.

If you and your spouse do not talk about the issues the family faces, one of you may be left out of important matters you should be informed about.

To avoid this situation, you and your spouse need to commit yourselves to communicate about every significant issue in your family life. At least once a day the two of you need to check in with each other and discuss what happened that day that was important. At the same time, talk about long-term issues that may be confronting the family.

Confusion.

Uncertainly about what stands to take and what rules to impose can create turmoil within the family. Too often, parents are perplexed about issues like the degree of supervision required for their children and the amount of freedom to give them. Parents frequently do not make decisions at all, and that can leave their children puzzled and dismayed over what is expected of them.

You and your spouse need to resolve your own ambivalence on important family matter and agree on a position on these issues. Then you must clearly inform the entire family about your decisions and how their own lives will be affected by them.

Competition.

Sometimes rivalry can develop between parents over their children's attention and love. If Dad wants his daughter to spend Saturday afternoon fishing with him but Mom wants her to go shopping with her, they may struggle to get their way, putting the child in an unenviable position, right in the middle of the conflict. The two of you need to find ways to cooperate, not compete, with each other. That doesn't mean you have to agree on everything; but it does mean that you are committed to working together toward a more harmonious relationship and family life, and you are not going to let differences undermine your common goals. Each of you needs to demonstrable some flexibility.

As you form ground rules for the family, identity the areas in  which each parent excels. That parent should then exert leadership in the ares of his or her strength, so the decision-making responsibilities are divided within the family.

Overt Conflict.

Too often, parents argue and openly challenge each other on family-related matters. Perhaps their child has gotten into trouble at school, and the parents disagree about how to handle it; the mother may think the child should be grounded, while the father believes in wasn't her fault. They start to argue sometimes for hours or even over a period of days-and eventually, rather than resolving the problem amicably, one parent wins out because the other ultimately gives in, at least for the moment. Nevertheless, the parental power struggle often begins all over again at a later time with a different issue, with some of the same anger from the previous conflict resurfacing. The wounds never fully heal and the animosity builds.

Clearly, this is not a healthy situation. Parents need to learn the skills of conflict resolution.

These include:

- Listening

- Clarifying points of difference

- Tanking each other's feelings seriously

- Generating alternative solutions together

- Negotiating

Remember, the way you handle conflict in your family is how your child learns to manage disagreement.

Inculcating ethics and respect

Much of the world's problems can be solved by dialogue and a true understanding of the situation as seen by each of the warring parties. While we hope our children will never be the victims of genocide and racism, we must also endeavor to bring them up in ways which make them aware of such divisions and equip them to face these issues straight on.

Set your priorities. Look within yourself and ask what are the values, thoughts and attitudes that you want to inculcate in your child. Be generous with your words of encouragement every time your child shows signs of having internalized those values.

Begin early. Even toddlers and preschoolers can understand words and concept like 'caring', 'sharing', 'kindness', 'truth' and 'responsibility'. So start inculcating these values in them very early in life. Also train them early in their lives into good habits like using the dustbin, cleaning their hands before a meal, and saying thank you when someone does them a good deed.

Practice what you preach. Set an example. You can't expect them to be honest if you call up your office to say you are sick when you are actually planing to go out for a movie.

Be consistent. Be consistent in the values or habits that you impart to your children, whether it be apologizing for a wrong doing or saying a prayer before dinner. If you say your prayers before dinner when yo are at home but not when you go out to a restaurant to eat, you only confuse your children. The message that they might get from this is that habits and values are flexible and can be molded or adapted according to one's convenience.

Beware of lip service. It is not enough for the kids to know when to say 'i' sorry', 'please' and 'thank you' but also to know the meaning of these words. For example, if the child tenders an apology to a sibling she should not only say 'i'm sorry' but also offer something as compensation, say, a hug or a kiss or a favorite toy. this will help bring home the point that they are responsible for the consequences of their actions.

Involved other people associated with your child. Your baby sitter also needs to know about what is important to you. After all she spends a considerable amount of time with your child and can influence her thinking in no small measure.

The personal touch. Encourage and help children to make their own gift instead of taking them to the shopping malls to buy expensive gifts for friends and relatives. In this way they learn that their thoughtfulness and effort is much more valuable than anything money can buy.

Capture the teachable moment. Don't just rely on family time to instill and impart values. Seize every teachable moment - while dropping your child to school, while going on a drive, or while watching TV - to important the right kind of values.

Inspire them. Parents often tend to lecture or preach. This may backfire. Kids may tune out, or they may rebel inwardly while being complaint on the surface. Ultimately, children learn not from lectures, but because of the respect parents show them. Praise and respect kids for their right and good deeds.

Stress busting back to school blues

Recent surveys suggest that more than 80 percent of children say that school is the major source of stress in their life. The two major types of stresses are social (bullies, difficulties making friends, missing home, etc.) and academic (difficulties in doing the work or problems with  a specific subject). Here are some suggestions for parents that may help make going to school easier:

* Remind your child that he/she is not alone in feeling anxious during the first day of school.

* Before school starts, make sure that all the logistics and paper work have been done in order to avoid any confusion and extra stress during the first day of school. 

* When appropriate, drive or walk your child to school and pick him/her up on the first day. Going to school with a friend from the neighborhood may help too.

* make sure that your child has had his annual medical check up including vision screening. Also, make the proper arrangements if your child needs to take medication at school. If your child has any allergies (especially food allergies) make sure that the school is aware of them and is prepared for any allergic reactions.

* When your child is starting the year at a new school, recognize that he/she might need extra support. Talk to your child about his/her thoughts and fears about the new school. It's also a good idea to visit the school with your child before school begins. Looking into the new classroom will help make the first official day of school easier. Also, if possible, meeting a new classmate or two before school starts is also a good idea.

By recognizing that school is stressful to most children, parents can continually support their children and keep an open dialogue on any school-related issue with their child. Also, children are reassured when they discover that their parents went through school and survived! It's always a good idea to share your school experiences with them too!

Building up the shy child

Shyness is a common but little understood emotion. Everyone has felt ambivalent or self-conscious  in new social situations. However, at times shyness may interfere with optimal social development and restrict children's learning.

The basic feeling of shyness is universal, and may have evolved as an adaptive mechanism used to help individuals cope with novel social stimuli. Shyness is felt as a mix emotions, including fear and interest, tension and pleasantness. Increase in heart rate and blood pressure may occur. An observer recognizes shyness by an averted, downward gaze and physical and verbal reticence. The shy person's speech is often soft, tremulous, or hesitant. Younger children may suck their thumbs, some act coy, alternately smiling and pulling away.

Shyness is distinguishable from two related behavior patterns; wariness and social disengagement. Infant wariness of strangers lacks the ambivalent approach/avoidance quality that characterizes shyness. Some older children may prefer solitary play and appear to have low needs for social interaction, but experience none of the tension of the genuinely shy child.

Children may be vulnerable to shyness at particular developmental points. Fearful shyness in response to new adults emerges in infancy. Cognitive advances in self-awareness bring greater social sensitivity in the second year. Self-conscious shyness - the possibility of embarrassment appears at four or five. Early adolescence ushers in a peak of self - consciousness.

What situations make children feel shy?

New social encounters are the most frequent causes of shyness, especially if the shy person feel herself to be the focus of attention. An"epidemic of shyness" has been attributed to the rapidly changing social environment and competitive pressures of school and work with which children and adults must cope. Adults who constantly call attention to what others think of the child, or who allow the child little autonomy, may encourage feelings of shyness.

Some children are dispositionally shy: they are more likely than other children to react to new social situations with shy behavior. Even these children, however, may show shyness only in certain kinds of social encounters. Researchers have implicated both nurture and nature in these individual differences.

Some aspects of shyness are learned. Children's cultural background and family environment offer models of social behavior. some parents, by labeling their children as shy, appear to encourage a self- fulling prophecy. adults may cajole coyly shy children into social interaction, thus reinforcing shy behavior.

There is growing evidence of a hereditary or temperamental basis for some variations of dispositional shyness. In fact, heredity may play a large part in shyness than in other personality trait. Adoption studies can predict shyness in adopted children from the biological mother's sociability. Extremely inhibited children show physiological differences from uninhibited children, including higher and more stable heart rates. From age two to five, the most inhibited children continue to show reticent behavior with new peers and adults. Patterns of social passivity or inhibition are remarkably consistent in longitudinal studies of personality development.

Despite this evidence, most researchers emphasize that genetic influences probably account for only a small proportion of self-labeled shyness. Even hereditary predispositions can be modified.

When is shyness a problem?

Shyness can be a normal, adaptive response to potentially overwhelming social experiences. By being somewhat shy, children can withdraw temporarily and gain a sense of control. Generally, as children gain experience with unfamiliar people, shyness wanes. In the absence of other difficulties, shy children have not been found to be significantly at risk for psychiatric or behavior problems. In contrast, children who exhibit extreme shyness which is neither context-specific nor transient may be at some risk. Such children may lack social skills or have poor self-images.

Shy children have been found to be less competent at initiating play with peers. School-age children who rate themselves as shy tend to like themselves less and consider themselves less friendly and more passive than their non-shy peers. Such factor negatively affect other's perceptions. For all these reasons, shy children may be neglected by peers, and have few chances to develop social skills. Children who continue to be,excessively shy into adolescence and adulthood describe themselves as being more lonely, and having fewer close friends and relationships with members of the opposite sex, than their peers.

Helping the shy child

Being sensitive to the child's interests and feelings will allow you to build a relationship with the child and show that you respect the child. This can make the child more confident and less inhibited.

Shy children may have negative self-images and feel that they will not be accepted. Reinforce shy children for demonstrating skills and encourage their autonomy. Praise them often.

Reinforce shy children for social behavior, even if it is only parallel play. Play with new groups of peers permits shy children to make a fresh start and achieve a higher peer status.

Pushing a child into a situation which he or she sees as threatening is not likely to help the child build social skill. Help the child feel secure and provide interesting materials to lure him or her into social interactions.

Not every child needs to be the focus of attention. Some qualities of shyness, such as modesty and reserve, are viewed as positive. As long as a child does not seem excessively uncomfortable or neglected around others, drastic interventions are not necessary. 

The good behavior guide

Good behavior is not something that happens by accident. A well-mannered, polite child is a pleasure to be around, but a petulant, rude one can only be blamed on the parents. To get the best out of your child, try these ideas:

1. Pay off correct behavior, not misbehavior. Reinforce polite requests, not whining, teasing and tantrums. Reinforce calm discussions, not arguments and power struggles.

2. Think before you talk. Say what you mean. Mean what you say. Reward yourself for being consistent.

3. Expect good behavior from your children. Children must know what you expect from them and what they can expect from you. When children can predict how you will behave in reaction to them, they will make better behavioral choices themselves.

4. Children believe what you tell them. Coach your children on ways to behave appropriately. Teach your children that effort is essential. Use plenty of encouragement. When you encourage your children, they will see that you have faith and confidence in them, and will have it in themselves.

5. Once you recognize a misbehavior pattern, establish a plan. Tell them the rules in advance and be specific and reasonable. Using charts or contracts, spotlight success and provide support and encouragement.

6. Use punishments that teach decision-making and accountability. Children survive reasonable punishments, such as restriction and time-outs. Do not punish when you are angry.

7. Begin teaching responsibility and decision-making when your children are young. This will prepare them for the real world. Remember, children needs limits, structure, ground rules and consistency. Children will see these qualities as an expression of your love and concern.

8. Focus on your children's positive qualities but love them regardless of their behavior.

9. Teach your children to seek self-reward -- to feel good about doing the right thing.

10. Provide a healthy and pleasant family climate. Emphasize each other's strengths and accept one another's weaknesses.

Beyond reasonable doubt

The reason young children do the things they do is because they are just that - young children. They have not developed the ability to think things through, understand cause-and-effect relationship, or quickly learn from past mistakes. They are naturally self-centered social inexperienced. Many of the lessons they learn take a lot of trial and error. That's the bad news.

The good news is that there is something you can do that will help your children learn new skills and make good choices. Look at the following list of questions. They all start with the word "why".

Why won't my children do what I want them to do more often? Why don't my children understand that their behavior affects others? why doesn't my child seem to know the benefits of doing things the wright way? As the parent of a young child, you have probably asked yourself these questions and others like them.

Giving reasons is the key to helping children understand what we are teaching them. Young children want and need to know why. They need to understand why things do and do not happen. They need to know how their behavior affects themselves and others. They need to know why some choices are better than others. Learning these connections helps children understand why they should do some things and do not do others. To help children understand these "why", parents must give reasons.

Here are few thoughts on using reasons with your children:

. Use kid reasons

There are many types of reasons that can be used with young children, but the ones that seem to work best are those that are important to them. So, whenever possible, use reasons that will show your children how their behavior affects them.

. Use reasons often

You may need to use a reason several times in similar situations before your child begins to understand. Over time, thought, your persistence and patience will help your children learn how their behavior affects what happens to them.

. Be brief

The attention span of young children can be very short, so the reasons you used need to be just as short.

. Be real

Even thought children are young, they learn very quickly what is likely to happen and what is not. Make sure you use reasons that point out realistic outcomes of their behavior.

. Focus on the positive

While it is true that unpleasant things can result when children misbehave, we don't want kids to always be motivated by the fear or bad things happening. Rather, we want them to be motivated by the positive things that result from doing things well. So, use reasons that show your children how they and others benefit from doing something well.

 Reasons are wonderful tools to use with all children, regardless of age. Reasons teach children how the world works by telling them what is likely to happen as a result of their behavior. There are important lessons for children to learn. Although children understand reasons better as they get older, there is evidence that reasons are effective with children as young as three years old. So get in the habit of giving reasons when you teach. Both you and your children will benefit. 

Fun keeping fit

Alternative ways to get the kids moving

Every parent has heard the dire warnings about increasing rates of obesity and the sedentary lifestyle of modern children. We know you know everything that should be done to keep kids fit,such as making them eat more fruits as opposed to more snacks; and encouraging more fun in the sun rather than time at the computer. Here are some ideas to make getting fit even more fun by promoting activity, not exercise.

. Be silly. Let younger children see how much fun you can have while being active. Run like a gorilla. Walk like a spider. Hop like a bunny, Stretch like a cat.

. Get in the game. Play catch, get the whole family involved in a game of tag or have a jump-rope contest. Try classic movement games such as Simon says or red light, green light. If you don't remember the rules, make up your own!

. Count your chores. You might even make it  a friendly challenge. Who can pull the most weeds out of the vegetable garden? Who can collect the most litter in the neighborhood? Who can sweep up the biggest pile of leaves?

. Try an activity party. For your child's next birthday, schedule a bowling party, take the kids to a climbing wall or set up relay races in the backyard.

. Put your kids in change. Let each child take a turn choosing the activity of the day or week. Batting cages, bowling and fast-food play areas all count. What matters is that you're doing something active.

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Listening without prejudice

How to respect your children by listening to them

"You never listen to me" is a complaint heard as often from children as parents. Good
communication helps children and parents to develop confidence, feelings of self-worth, and good relationships with others. Try these tips:

. Teach children to listen by gently touching a child before you talk or saying their name.

. Speak in a quiet voice. Whisper sometimes so children have to listen.

. Look a child in the eyes so you can tell when they understand. Bend or sit down in order to     become the child's size.

. Practice listening and talking: talk with  your family about what you see on TV, hear on the radio or see at the park or store.

. Talk with your children about school and their friends.

. Respect children and use a courteous tone of voice. If we talk to our children as we would our friends,our youngsters may be more likely to seek us out as confidants.

. Catch children and teens being good. Praise them for cooperating with you or their siblings, or for doing those little things that are so easy to take for granted.

. Use door openers that invite children to say more about an incident or their feelings. "I see," "oh," "tell me more," "no kidding," "really," "mmmmmhmmmmm," "say that again, i want to be sure i understand you."

. Praise builds a child's confidence and reinforces communication. Unkind words tear children down and teach them that they just aren't good enough.

. Children are never too old to be told they are loved. Saying "I love you" is important. Writing it in a note provides the child with a reminder that he can hold on to.

. Give your undivided attention when your children want to talk to you. Don't read, watch TV, fall asleep or make yourself busy with other task

Friends for life?

As your child grows up and interacts with the people around him, he will be renewing old friendships and making new ones. Some tweens have a stronger natural ability to develop and maintain relationships. But all can use some help evaluating their friendships. Don't assume your child knows the fundamentals of healthy relationships.

Teach the language and actions of respect, and let your child know that you expect him or her to treat others with respect as well as to require it from others. Be a good role model in your own relationships. Help your child examine his or her friendships to determine which are healthy and which may need to be ended. Here are some questions for your child to think about:

. A relationship is not healthy if one person uses the other. It should be equal. Who is giving and who is taking in this relationship?

. Relationships are just one portion of life. Putting too much emphasis on a particular relationship takes away from all the other aspects in your life. Has this ever happened to you? When?

. Relationships are always changing; some will change for the better, some for the worse. What are some ways your relationships have changed?

. Healthy relationships should make a person feel safe and comfortable. If you do not feel this way, why not?

. Look at your past relationships, both good and bad, and then describe what each relationship is like now. If it has changed, what happened to change?

. Identify things that you have done or changed just to please another person. Did the other person also change?

. Look at present relationships. List why certain people are better friends than others.

. What happens when when someone of the opposite sex is attracted to you? What behaviors are appropriate for the first date?

. Do you rush into poorly considered relationships? Are you impulsive, or do you think things out?

. List the qualities that you think make a good friend.

Learning how to ask questions about all relationships will help your child avoid a harmful friendship and feeling stuck. It will also point out things that he or she needs to improve to be a better friend. As parent, you can use this to start a nonjudgmental discussion about someone that concerns you in your child's life.

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How busy is too busy?

It's pretty common to hear parents talk about racing their child from one activity to the next-or to a football game, school club, dance tryout or a roster of activities. Some parents might feel their child is "missing out" if he isn't constantly occupied. There are various reasons to why our kids are so harried, but it all adds up to overload.

 If you notice these signs, they may mean your child is too busy:

-Feeling tired, exhausted or depressed

-Not enjoying the activity they once loved

-Lower grades in school

-Complaining of headaches or body aches, which may be due to stress or lack of sleep

-Having stomach pain, which may be due to missed meals or stress

An active schedule can wear on a child's social and family life. When a child is too busy to play with friends, his friendships may suffer-as does the family structure if one parent is busy running one child to karate practice while the other parent is at a dance recital. Not to mention, it can be extremely tiresome for everyone involved.

If you feel your child is too busy, try to:

-Schedule activities in moderation. Start slow and add an additional activity when you feel your child is ready to multi-task.

-Make sure the activity is developmentally appropriate for the age of your child.

-Keep a family calender to stay organized. Place the calendar in a place where everyone can see it and can add their activities.

-Mark off a day on the calendar as a family day. Do not schedule any individual activities on that day and do something together as a family.

-Parents may need to say "No". If adding one more activity is going to overload your child, you can talk to her about dropping an activity to add the new one.

Clothes make the child

Clothing and dressing play important roles in children's learning and development. Parents can give children positive messages about clothes by:


. Discussing clothing with children. Talk about tastes and preferences in clothing and fashion with children. Even every young children can have a keen interest in what they and others wear. As children become older they often also become interested in clothing that shows favorite characters. Many school aged children, and even some younger children, are conscious of labels and fashions. When discussing clothing with children, adults should avoid sending children the message that they are being 'judged' either positively or negatively by what they wear.

. Make the selection of clothes and dressing a pleasant experience. When children become interested in dressing and undressing themselves, make the tasks achievable and give as little help as is needed for the child to continue. For younger children, this may mean using strategies such as pulling a sock partially off and asking the child to take it off the rest of the way. Let children try when they want to, and offer them encouragement. Like other routines, dressing activities offer a valuable chance for quality, one to one interactions with children.


. Dressing children to support their play and learning. Clothing can either support or hinder children's experiences and development. Clothes that fit properly, without being too loose or tight, allow children to move freely and comfortably and participate freely in experiences. For girls, dresses and skirts may interfere with their participation in physical activities. Wearing trousers or shorts may allow for free movement and reduce children's self-consciousness, particularly for older children. The clothes children wear can significantly affect the development of their self-help skills. For example, trousers that fit loosely and have an elastic waist are easier for young children to pull down and up.

Good School Foundations Happen Before School

Too often parents make the choice of a preschool or nursery based solely on proximity to the home, a parent's work place or close to a child minder. Many parents failed to realize that the teachers a young child meets at his nursery, or preschool will play a big role in how a child develops emotionally and intellectually.

A preschool teacher is responsible for teaching children, usually up to the age of 5, about things related to intellectual, physical and social growth. They will help the children to interact with others while learning necessary tools to get them ready for kindergarten.

The preschool teacher has a number of general responsibilities in their daily teaching job. They must provide a wonderful learning environment for the children, teach them how to interact with others and help them with their daily needs. The preschool teacher will instruct them in basic educational programs, teach them to be creative and provide them with a safe and caring environment to learn and grow.

With regard to educational aspects, the preschool teacher must prepare daily lesson plans to help the children start learning basic education to get them ready for primary school. The preschool teacher will have a set educational plan each day which the children will be involved with as a group.

The preschool teacher must also prepare creative activities for the children to complete each day. It is important that creativity is a big part of the preschool experience and preschool teachers will prepare various activities for the children to engage in. Things such as arts and  crafts, music and imagination will all play a big role in the creative learning process.

One who is a preschool teacher must also prepare outdoor activities and games for the students. These will help them improve their coordination and motor skills. With that said, the preschool teacher must ensure a safe play environment for the children to engage in activities within.

A preschool teacher must also cater to the basic needs of the children. One who oversees a preschool class must feed the children, serve them beverages and help them with their bathroom needs. They must ensure that they provide a comfortable, nurturing environment for the littlr ones within their care.

Along with teaching the children various things, the preschool teacher must also monitor their development. It is important to know which children are doing fine and which ones may need a little extra help. This will be done by monitoring progress and making notes of the progress of each child.

The preschool teacher is also responsible for meeting with other education professionals and parents of the children. During these meetings, the preschool teacher will discuss their lesson plans, what they are doing to  improve their classroom techniques and how each of the children are doing with their progress.

So, before you settle for the most convenient play school, consider if the teachers you meet at the school you have chosen live up to these criteria. It may be the best thing you will do for your child!